scribbled ; 10:58 am on Wednesday, May 28, 2008
and yes.. im sch in now.. ytd only had sore throat.. today package come already.. thats so wtf.. it really seems that im damn stresesd up now.. arghh... cant take it anymore..

for the past 2 years.. whenever im sick.. there's still someone there for me.. at least i can find myself a comfort zone.. but now.. there's no one.. so gotta really bite my lips hard to endure.. thats the constrast so far.. but being sick is wad i hate most.. its killing me.. omg..

even without thinking of any other problems i have.. my sch work alone is really taking its toll.. i really dun understand.. really dont.. i wonder.. why does everything in this world has to be involved with money.. i hafta agree.. without money u cant do nuts bout anything.. haha..

the package im having could be becos of my own illness.. im not sure.. i just hope the condition dont get worst.. God, please give me a chance.. i wanna hold on.. im hanging on now.. i must understand that there's no one i can rely on now.. except myself.. so i hafta be really strong.. no one's gonna help me if im not gonna help myself..

i also understands that nothing in this world is free.. i only noe u hafta work hard for it.. i understand everything.. but there's always one thing stopping me.. that's courage.. i have no courage.. yes.. no courage in anything im doing now.. im doubting my abilities.. and i really dunno what i want.. that is how bad things are now..

thats why im saying.. will daylight ever appear again? im hoping that daylight will come again.. as my life is filled with darkness now.. i dont wanna be drowned by the darkness.. i wanna prevail.. give me the strength i need.. please..


yeah.. im still in sch.. adding on to what i've blogged earlier.. well.. really feeling damn sian.. cos i've got no cash with me.. im sick and starving.. argh.. its really torturing.. it could be really a test of endurance for me.. haha.. feel damn stoned now.. hais..