scribbled ; 9:26 pm on Sunday, December 12, 2004
i feel stupid.. feeling very down.. am i played out by ppl for fun?? im not sure.. only the person noes the answer.. i do not noe.. life seems to be useless to me anymore.. i need sometime to reflect.. but even if i do.. will that help?? lonely christmas for me this year.. dun wanna say bout it.. well.. maybe gonna keep drinking to drown my sorrows.. ppl think im stupid.. and hopeless maybe.. but that place in my heart can never be removed.. you guys dun understand wad im going thru.. i noe drinking is not gonna help.. but i needa numb myself.. especially my heart.. hai.. life dont mean anything at all..